Turning 21

The legal age of drinking. The start of actual adulthood. The first year of your twenties complete. No one told me I would feel so old already. I always hear people saying they feel like they are running out of time already, and I never understood that until now. I am in a unique case where I am also graduating in a few days, which does not help with feeling old. Like, I actually have to be an actual adult now.

I’m not sure what I thought 21 would feel like—maybe a bit more glamorous, a little more exciting. Instead, it’s a weird mix of nostalgia and pressure. Like, I’m looking back at childhood milestones I swore happened just yesterday, and suddenly I’m at the edge of the “real world,” staring into a future that expects me to have answers. And truthfully? I don’t.

But maybe that’s okay.

Turning 21 isn’t about having it all figured out. It’s about realizing that nobody else does either. It’s the beginning of becoming more confident in not knowing. It’s the year where “I’ll figure it out” becomes less of a panic response and more of a life motto. And that’s powerful.

Graduating and turning 21 at the same time kind of feels like ripping off two big life Band-Aids at once. The security of college life is ending, and the structure of your early twenties is just starting to form. But I’ve learned that the biggest growth happens in those in-between spaces—when things are messy and uncertain and a little overwhelming.

So here’s some advice, from someone still figuring it out too:

• Take the pressure off your timeline. Life doesn’t have to move at the speed of your Instagram feed. Your 20s are not a race.

• Let yourself grieve the end of one chapter before you rush into the next. It’s okay to miss college. It’s okay to be scared of what comes next.

• Celebrate the small stuff. A clean apartment, making dinner instead of Postmates, finally figuring out how health insurance works—those are wins.

• Don’t let the fear of being behind keep you from moving forward. Everyone’s path is different, and nobody is showing you the full picture.

Turning 21 is less about wild parties and more about quietly stepping into yourself. It’s about realizing you can be strong and soft, brave and unsure, all at once.

So if you’re feeling old, overwhelmed, or like you're somehow already late to life—breathe. You’re right on time.